Yes, this is a mom website, a place where we use words like poop and penis and breastmilk and we don’t really think twice about it.  Want to discuss the color and texture of baby poop?  Sure!  But today we’re talking about that dreaded potty training problem – kids who refuse to poop in the potty.

A mom asked: “HELP. I have an almost 3 year old that just will not poopy in the potty. Going Pee Pee is a breeze, goes everytime in the potty, but when it comes to poopy…NO WAY. Any suggestions on getting my child to poopy in the potty? This mom is tired of cleaning poopy underwear.”

Here’s what the moms had to say – real answers from real people.  Guess what, kids don’t always do what the books say!

Try having him/her “help clean up” their mess. Of course they’ll do a toddler’s worth of actual work, but the fact that they had to be there in the room with you for the clean up process might start to get the point across

I bought the BEST underwear for my daughter. We went and let her pick it out. She loved her Barbie and Dora panties. I told her if she pooped in them, she would have to throw them away because I was tired of cleaning poop. She cried having to throw them away! Cost me 2 packs of panties. Well worth it! She got the point.

My son would not Poopy in the potty, I went 6 months with pee no problem. When I was cleaning it up one day, frustrated I told him he had to do it next time. Next time he pooped in his pants I put him in the bathtub and made him take his pants off, after a HUGE meltdown (he didn’t want to touch the poop) he finally did “clean” himself up. I must say it was horrible but it worked very few accidents after that!!

 We had the same problem and we created the very special prize closet. I went to target and bought her a character nightgown that I knew she couldn’t resist. Put it on a hanger in our coat closet and shut the door. Told her when she was ready to put her poo in the potty she could have the nightgown. This is kind of the expensive route because she expected a reward from the prize closet every time…tattoos bubbles etc but it worked…almost immediately.

We’ve done the prizes too and it was a huge help but I just hit the dollar store toy aisle. We’ve also used marshmallows and Hersey kisses as rewards too. We leave a container in the bathroom so they are a constant reminder.

Try the above suggestions, but don’t force him/her — It will completely backfire on you. Some kids are scared, some just aren’t physically/developmentally ready, and some have actual medical reasons for the problem. I’m not saying to give up, but try to remember that pull-ups are not the end of the world. Almost 3 is not that old, either. (This advice is coming from someone who did it all wrong the first time around!)

I did a visual chart. After so many successful times, my son would get a toy. Also, when he had an accident I made him clean it up. Sounds mean but he finally got tired of the hassle.

I figured out that my son needed privacy when he pooped. I would put him on the toilet and close the door and told him to call me when he was done. I would stand outside the door and wait and it worked. We also did naked toilet training and that was better too bc he wouldn’t go on the floor but would in his pants

My daughter was FOUR before she would poop in the potty. She knew exactly what she was doing and peed in the potty for over a year before she would poop. We tried toys, charts, anything – she just didn’t want to do it. Then one day she did and never had an accident (pee or poo) since. It wasn’t the end of the world to wait for her to do it in her own time. Everything I read at the time deterred me from “shaming” her over the toilet issue and I’m still glad I didn’t take that route.

I washed my 4 yo’s soiled underwear every day for 6 months. We tried stickers, candy, special underwear, cleanup duty. Nothing worked. Save your sanity and put your child back in pull-ups – try again in a few weeks.

my son was 4 yrs, 4 mos before he pooped in the potty. Perfectly bright, peed in potty every time, but kept pooping his pants. I was starting to think about taking him to a shrink. Nothing worked. Prizes, candy, chuck e cheese, nothing. But one day he was ready. he’s almost five now, and I still cheer for him everytime he poops in the potty. Probably will until he leaves for college.

I had to throw away a few pairs of underwear when my kids pooped in them, it made mine think about it a little more when it was a favorite pair. Hang in there!

Don’t mention it anymore. Act as if it is no big deal..because it really is not…he/she will do it quicker without pressure and constant battles.

If they are at home with you every day create a poop schedule…. After lunch I have mine go straight to the little potty for 20 or 30 minutes. I let them watch a show or play on the leapster to keep them there. Eventually they will go a little. For your sanity, pull ups!!! Eventually the accidents will stop.