Sometimes having a baby can make being pregnant and giving birth seem like a piece of cake. I didn’t suffer from PPD, but I did have other serious problems. My first son had silent reflux and took 30-minute naps, so my days were filled with a lot of screaming (both of us) and not much sleep. I breastfed and he wouldn’t take a bottle, so there wasn’t a way for my husband to easily step in and help.
After several months of this I was completely exhausted. I don’t mean tired. Exhausted. Exhausted to the point where I apologized to my husband for wanting to have children, and brought up the idea of finding someone else to care for him as I just couldn’t do it anymore. No joke. It was that bad.
Upon hearing this my mom immediately bought a plane ticket and was there to help within three days. She basically sent me to bed to sleep as much as possible and relax a little. Those few days off were enough to bring me back to life so I could care for my child. Thanks mom!! Thankfully at 10 months old he started taking real naps and being his mom was so much easier.
I tell this story because I think it’s important for moms, especially new moms, to know that not everyone loves being a mom all the time. Some days the job really sucks, and there are times when every day is a struggle. If all the moms you encounter seem to have their shit together – rested, showered, smiling – don’t assume it’s like that for them all the time. And realize that they might have just “won” the baby lottery and gotten an easy child. They do exist…I’ve seen them!
For moms who are facing more than just being tired – moms who just can’t shake their sadness – your obstetrician is the best place to start. A mom recently asked: “do you have any recommendations for a therapist to help a first time mom struggling with anxieties and possible postpartum depression?”
Here are other suggestions from the moms of East Memphis:
- I suffered from PPD and it sucked- please don’t suffer. There is no reason to suffer. Tell your doctor, talk to a friend or reach out for to someone on EMM. It is nothing to be ashamed of. Being an mom is a freaking hard job. For most of us the transition was not all lollipops and roses. Don’t let anyone fool you! As mom’s we need to support each other and be real about motherhood!
- The best thing I’ve found for PPD is the FAR infrared sauna. Works wonders and no side effects. I love the one at Renew Wellness Spa but I think there are other places in Memphis.
- I would talk to your OB about it. It’s completely normal, but totally not something to deal with on your own. It’s not fair to you! Take care!
- I had PPD as well…maybe a MOPS group might help—Mother’s of Preschoolers—they have a website that shows locations. Mine was thyroid induced….so get that checked out as well. After trying counseling and other options …if they don’t work….get some medication , even if it is for just a couple of months. You are not alone….other women experience it Mom Support Groups
Professional Help Recommendations
Christian Psychological Center – Anyone at Christian Psychological (by 2nd Pres)
- I agree-Christian Psych. Services. Please encourage her to get help soon! Also another plug for Hope Moms groups-they have a first time moms group that is very open and welcoming, and a safe place to talk to other moms about your feelings.
- I second anyone at the Christian Psychological Center
Dr. Sheila Cohen…love her!
Roseanna Capooth, PHD. She is great! Helped me through the loss of my first baby & the with the birth of my 2nd child.
I really do not know if she is still in Memphis, but Nancy Adler was VERY helpful to me back when I was in a similar situation 🙂 She had an office off of Yates, near the Poplar/Yates intersection in East Mempohis (I-240)
Sarah Lebovitz. And I think I can speak for all of us when I say it gets easier and it gets better. The more time you spend with other moms, the easier it will be.
Homecoming Postpartum Services – Beth Shelton has started a support group in the High Point Terrace area: “new moms with postpartum mood and anxiety disorders. We meet Thursdays at 11:00 at my office. It’s pay-what-you-can ($10 suggested fee). I won’t turn anyone away if they can’t afford to pay anything. They can contact me for details [email protected]”